I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
