You work out of a Hotel?
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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