Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i came on her dog
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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