i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Randomize