His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
