he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
