Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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