so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
