I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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