you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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