I wish you could order shots online.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
