I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
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