U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize