Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
