Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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