Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
