did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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