You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize