There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
