yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
