WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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