I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
