so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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