Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
