Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
