I CAN MOONWALK!
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
