sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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