youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Randomize
