My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
