Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
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