so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize