white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I want to fling myself into the sun
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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