I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
