Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
