she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
These tits shall not be calmed
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
