I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
