I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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