Quick, to the slutcave!
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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