On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
