with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
