He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
It's never too late to be topless.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
