That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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