I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
People with herpes should wear stickers.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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