Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize