Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize