i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
