I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
