Little spoons don't ask big questions
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
