I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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