would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
