Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
