Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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